Ancrene Unready
I promised Comp Class: Impossible that they would have a freshly graded set of papers tomorrow. I am not ready.
I teach Comp Class: Impossible tomorrow. I am not ready for that, either.
I have my first martial-arts test tomorrow. So not ready. And staying up most of the night to grade papers will probably not help me any.
I have a huge stack of weeks-overdue admin work to do for my student government post.
I have a prospectus to write and a doctoral exam to plan for.
I have a broken couch and a seriously messy apartment.
I have not really, substantially checked in with the folks on Old Home Sod in much too long and have entirely lost track of what's going on with Wonder Woman's chemo and surgery schedule.
I have three inboxes full of emails.
I have not eaten dinner.
I am a Very Bad Wiseass Indeed.
And what am I doing? Why, I'm here, practicing Internet-based denial and writing complainy posts with titles only a punch-drunk medievalist could love.
In my defense, however, this has been one hell of a day, and I may deserve a little denial :
Exhibit 1) I held student office hours in the morning, conducting two major paper interventions, as well as a major personal intervention with a bright young spark who's somehow convinced herself that she's not all that bright and can't do what I'm asking of her.
Exhibit 2) I composed and turned in a resignation letter for abovementioned student-government post because other people's decisions--and their decision not to consult me about those decisions--put me in the untenable position of being unable to do my job and of dealing with a toxic personnel issue which I had absolutely no institutional authority to address. I feel like donkeyshit about quitting ("winners never quit?"), but have some hopes that, at least, my resignation letter may effect some much-needed changes.
Exhibit 3) I went to therapy, after which I needed more therapy to deal with the therapy.
Sigh.
This is the Wiseass not coping.
This is the Wiseass realizing she had better damn well get off her ass and start coping.
Dammit.
I teach Comp Class: Impossible tomorrow. I am not ready for that, either.
I have my first martial-arts test tomorrow. So not ready. And staying up most of the night to grade papers will probably not help me any.
I have a huge stack of weeks-overdue admin work to do for my student government post.
I have a prospectus to write and a doctoral exam to plan for.
I have a broken couch and a seriously messy apartment.
I have not really, substantially checked in with the folks on Old Home Sod in much too long and have entirely lost track of what's going on with Wonder Woman's chemo and surgery schedule.
I have three inboxes full of emails.
I have not eaten dinner.
I am a Very Bad Wiseass Indeed.
And what am I doing? Why, I'm here, practicing Internet-based denial and writing complainy posts with titles only a punch-drunk medievalist could love.
In my defense, however, this has been one hell of a day, and I may deserve a little denial :
Exhibit 1) I held student office hours in the morning, conducting two major paper interventions, as well as a major personal intervention with a bright young spark who's somehow convinced herself that she's not all that bright and can't do what I'm asking of her.
Exhibit 2) I composed and turned in a resignation letter for abovementioned student-government post because other people's decisions--and their decision not to consult me about those decisions--put me in the untenable position of being unable to do my job and of dealing with a toxic personnel issue which I had absolutely no institutional authority to address. I feel like donkeyshit about quitting ("winners never quit?"), but have some hopes that, at least, my resignation letter may effect some much-needed changes.
Exhibit 3) I went to therapy, after which I needed more therapy to deal with the therapy.
Sigh.
This is the Wiseass not coping.
This is the Wiseass realizing she had better damn well get off her ass and start coping.
Dammit.
posted by Ancrene Wiseass | 9:11 PM
<< Home