"Come saw some wood with me."

The other day, when I was in the grocery store, I noticed that the Brawny man had undergone a makeover. He is now more . . .well . . . brawny. He no longer has facial hair. He's suddenly a dashing brunette in red, shirt sleeves rolled up over his shapely forearms, ready to do your bidding. He seems to be laughing gently at something you said.

This Brawny Man is no tired 80s washout. You will not find him at the local bar, telling sad stories about his stunt-double glory days, when he used to kick it with Lee Majors and Farrah Fawcett. He is the Brawny Man of the New Millenium.

And he is not only strong: he is also soft.

To prove it, the folks at Georgia-Pacific have given Mr. Man a chance to strut his stuff in a series of "Innocent Escapes," which include foot massages, pony snuggling, active listening, spider-release programs, and, of course, wood sawing. Trust me: you don't want to miss this.

Thanks to T Gruagach Beag for pointing this out to me. Right now, I really don't even mind that stack of papers I have left to grade all that much. Because Brawny is always gonna be there for me.

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UPDATE: I'm well on the way to deciding that this is not simply amusing, but also a really fine parody of the ridiculous expectations foisted upon men. As T Gruagach Beag himself has said, "It's really kind of mean, because it draws you in by fulfilling your expectations, but it also mocks you for having them in the first place."

And, honestly, I think most people will find Brawny's fulfillment of expectations not only unattractive, but ultimately a little scary.

I may end up using this in the classroom somehow . . . .